I Failed My IPPT - With Pride!

Every year, we have a mandatory IPPT (Individual Physical Proficiency Test) which includes 4 static stations and a 2.4km run. For the past 7 years, I could clear the 4 static stations with ease, but when it came to the 2.4km run, I always failed miserably…

Well.. for us who failed IPPT, we must attend a compulsory Remedial Training (RT) for 2 months.

I have been attending RT for the past 2 weeks (I failed my IPPT last year, clocking 18 minutes for my 2.4km run where I needed 13 minutes and below to pass).

Surprise Test

Today I went for my Remedial Training without realizing that we were having our IPPT. I thought the test was 2 weeks later! I was training very hard for my 2.4km run. I wanted to clock below 15 minutes for the first month, and pass my IPPT during my 2nd month of RT! So imagine my shock when I was told we are having our test today!! I was totally not prepared!

My 15 minutes Target

I was really in a state of panic.. as I know I was not ready for the test yet! I do not want to fail this test.. or at least I was targeting to clock below 15 minutes for it.. abeit not this early! After calming myself down, I decided to go for 15 minutes .. and I promised myself to complete the run without stopping! (For the past 7 years, 3 years I did not even complete the 2.4km)

My heart was pumping so fast when i was on the track, I thought I heard the sound of my heartbeats!

The Run Started

So it started.. and I started my run with the pace that I have been practicing for the past 2 weeks, the pace that I knew very well that if i can keep up with for the full 6 rounds, I can clock below my target of 15 minutes.

The first round was still ok.. although my legs felt unusually heavy, i still managed to keep up the pace. When it came to the 2nd round, I was grasping for air as though all the oxygen in the stadium has suddenly vanished.. and my stomach was twitching from earlier sit up test, and my lung was burning.. my legs were shouting for rest.. my shoulders started to feel sharp pains… and numbness started to creep down from my right shoulder to my hand… and then it started…

The Voice Within

The ever familiar voice started talking to me again.. At first.. it kept asking me questions.. questions like.. Why torture yourself like that? Are you sure you want to do this? You cannot pass anyway! .. Then it started telling me.. Stop and walk a bit.. it doesn’t affect anything.. You are very tired, you need to rest.. Why don’t you try next time, this test you are not prepared.. the voice.. it just kept talking and talking… and so many times in the past… i listened to it.. and gave up… but not this time!

Before the run.. I told myself no matter what I MUST run below 15 minutes.. this is my target.. and I MUST meet it.. and I also promised myself that I will complete the run without stopping.. no matter what!

I did not know why I was so determined.. but the voice just kept persuading me.. and the only thing I can do was kept repeating to myself, “Don’t give up, keep running… 15 minutes.. Don’t give up… keep running..”

Come to think of it.. the voice is just like fear.. you cannot make it disappear.. you cannot pretend it doesn’t exist.. the only way to overcome it is to face it and control it…

Perseverance

So throughout the 6 rounds… my voice was fighting the inner voice.. I just kept focusing on my target.. and that is to finish the run in 15 minutes and without stopping.

When I finished my 5th round.. I was left with exactly 2 and a half minutes to complete the last round. But I was completely exhausted, leg muscles on the verge of cramps… and basically every step was a struggle.. and the inner voice was at its loudest! It basically screaming at me to stop torturing myself.. threatening me that I can drop dead if I continue running…

Half way through the last round.. I looked at my watch and I knew I was about 20 seconds behind time.. with my current pace.. I will not be able to finish within 15 minutes… And I knew that the only way to hit my target now.. was to start sprinting.. and I hesitated for a moment.. my muscles going to cramp any moment.. It was a tough decision.. especially when my inner voice was correct.. this is not life and death.. why torture myself… but that was about the time I can afford to hesitate.. and I started to open up my strides.. then I increase my speed… faster and faster until I was sprinting… I was desperately grasping for air.. but at that moment.. I have decided nothing can stop me! Nothing! .. and then… I crossed the finishing line… and collapsed at the side… but I managed to steal a glance first.. 14:59 minutes!

Failed With Pride

I failed my IPPT.. my timing was 14:59 minutes.. but I was very very happy with myself! I have reached my target of running below 15 minutes (1 second different! Imagine if i hesitated for another second before sprinting!!), and I kept to my promise of not stopping even once throughout the run!

Somehow.. this experience has given me a tremendous boost in my self esteem and confident.. I have defeated the inner voice, and I knew for sure that if I focus on doing something, I will be able to do it!

So I like to declare that.. I have failed my IPPT today.. with PRIDE!

Cheers!

Pursue your dreams!

Albert Lee

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